Since hearing that singer Amy Winehouse passed away, I've been thinking a lot. I wasn't really a fan of her music, in fact I had to really think of one of her songs. The only one that came to mind was "Rehab". Her death was one of those things that people were expecting and I'm sure a lot of people weren't surprised about. I know I wasn't. But it is sad. Sad that she was so young. Sad that she couldn't pull herself out of her addiction. It has made fresh so many memories of watching Laura fight and struggle with her addiction. It's so heart wrenching to watch someone you love be consumed by addiction. The person they were falls away and they become someone nearly unrecognizable. You try to fight the battle for them but it's not yours to fight. So many times I went to battle against the monster that had such a deep hold on Laura. So many times my family went to battle. Every time we lost. Don't get me wrong, Laura fought too. She tried so many times. So many times. There were times where I could really see she wanted to get away from her captor but each time, she was pulled back in. Deeper.
I've seen stories online asking the question "Why didn't someone help Amy Winehouse more?" Once again, it's not our battle to fight. You can help, pray, talk, listen, cry... Only the addicted is the one who can win. Actor Russell Brand said something that really hit home to me. He said sometimes people in these addictions don't know there is someone out there to help them. I agree/disagree. Laura knew we were there but had gotten to a point where she thought she had burned all her bridges with us. She hadn't. Brand said "All they have to do is pick up the phone and make the call. Or not. Either way, there will be a phone call." I remember that final call. I knew it was coming.
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