Church

I was thinking about church earlier.  Thinking back to when I first moved here and we started looking for a new church home.  We tried a couple of churches in the area but they didn't seem to fit.  We came from a bigger church so we thought we might like to try a big church here.  Whoa!  Too much.  Not to hating on the bigger churches but attending this service made me wonder how you could really become part of a family in this church.  Would you ever know everyone in the church?  Would they know you?  For all the people around us knew, we'd been members of the church for years.  No one was out and out rude, but they weren't friendly either.  I took the boys to visit Parkway Baptist one Sunday and there were smiles to greet me and I met Brother Chris at the sanctuary doors.  Very friendly and welcoming.  I explained how we had just moved to town and were visiting churches looking for a new church home and he replied "Well, we'd sure like the job!"  So after a few months we had our new church home. So now we're part of this family.  We are involved in a few activities and have forged some good friendships along the way.

When I originally thought of church today, I was actually thinking of the worship service, or "big church".  I enjoy going to church and listening to Bro. Chris but do I really listen?  Can I remember what the last message was about?  So many times my mind seems to wander, or I'm telling one kid to sit down or another he can go to the bathroom.  Sometimes I'm distracted by other things.  I don't want to be.  I want to learn.  I want to soak up as much of God's teachings as I can.  I've taken a couple of small group bible studies and was amazed at what I learned, that in conversation about the topic, that I could actually participate, that I knew what I was talking about.  More importantly, I was learning God's word. 

I guess this is on my mind because our Women's Retreat is this weekend.  I love being part of events like this.  It always brings to the forefront my desire to be a child of God.  I always feel my spirit becomes renewed.  But alas, I allow life to get in the way and that fire gets doused a little.  In typing those last words this came to mind: "This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine.  This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine.  Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine".  Is your light burning bright for all to see, or are you like me and it's barely flickering sometimes?

You don't tug on Superman's cape...

When did I become this person who isn't afraid?  When did I become the person who kicks butt and takes names?  I don't know when the transformation happened, but it's who I am now.  My little sister comes to me and says "You HAVE to do something, they'll listen to you."  I call, send an angry, frustrated email and yep, they listen to me.  Now, I understand this doesn't happen under my power.  I've been sending up a few prayers today for patience and calm, but it feels good to be heard.  To know someone is actually listening to you.  I mean, LISTENING.  Not just "uh huh, gotcha, yeah". 

That being said, prayers are needed.  This quest for justice in my sister's death needs prayer.  We just need one teensy, tiny thing to tip the scales and for someone who has tortured many people and ruined lives to get what he deserves.  There are several things that could help, it's just getting any of these different pieces to fall into place.  Today I was given a renewed boost of hope.  All is not lost, not every option has been exhausted and we won't give up until it is.

Happy New Year

I've been meaning to post for a few weeks now.  I get something on my mind and think "I need to blog" then I just don't.  So much has been happening.  Jon had his first orchestra concert.  I was very impressed.  When they played their first warm up notes, I got a little teary.  Jon is enjoying orchestra but has been talking about changing to band next year.  Whatever he's interested in and makes him happy is fine with me.

We've been going to a lot of basketball games and Jon has been a "ball boy" at some of the women's games.  This means he gets to sit courtside and mop up sweat when the players fall.  He's really having fun with it.  Last night it was obvious why it's so fun for him.  He's about 3 feet away from the Aggie Dance team.  LOTS of booty shaking in his face.  NOOOOOOO!  He's definitely starting to notice girls.  I'm not ready for this.

Jess is still Jess.  WAAAYYYY obsessed with all sports.  We're signing both boys up for Upward's Spring soccer.


Christmas was good.  We always stress about what to get the boys, are we getting enough for the boys etc.  In the end we do what we can and they love it.  We traveled back to Nacogdoches to see family.  I was able to have lunch with a good friend and that was nice.  I miss having someone to hang out with.

So 2010 is gone and 2011 has arrived.  This past year really tested me.  I know the tests aren't over.